Saturday, July 14, 2012

Hot Dudes: Super Heroes.

If there is anything a lady loves more than chocolate it's a hot bod in spandex. Something a straight woman never says, "Ugh another superhero movie? I hate seeing really beautiful manly and chiseled man in a tight outfit saving the shit of the city that would burn if he wasn't there."
Don't we all want a superhero? If you answered no then WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?

Spider-man.
 Spider-man, the man who is remarkably like a spider. He once was a smarty pants weirdo. Roaming the halls like a nerd and getting bullied like a freak. Well double take, wait, what now? This dude gets a bit by a spider and wiggidy what WHAT? He can kick your ass to Kansas. Not only is he strong but he also has super sticky hands he is also hilarious.
"Wait is that a knife? How did you know my only weakness was small knives."
Anyways, here's more spandex pictures of Spider-man.




Sorry Toby Maguire you just don't make the cut, your Spider-man ness was less sexy and more awkward facial expressions.

Wolverine. 

Who knew that someone dressed in a wife beater and have really weird facial hair would be so GD sexy? I'm going to be honest and say nobody should ever try to attempt these things even if you have the muscles to match. It belongs on the fictional character. Also somehow his pure prickness makes him sexy as well. "Oh man he was being a total dick to me, I'm so turned on." (I've just now realized that that is how some people's brains work.. but it's supposed to be sarcastic.) Okay so really he is nice, because to be honest I probably wouldn't have saved Rouge, she's annoying and weird looking (sorry Anna Paquin don't worry you're a lot better looking now).

Thor.
Oh those locks. Oh those blue eyes that are framed by those lashes that could send his head into flight because they are so long. Oh those huge awesomely rugged muscles. It makes a uterus cry out "Put a baby in me you thunder god you!" There is never a time where he should have a shirt on... just sayin'
 You can thank google for that view. I'd walk through that desert to look at that bod, kidding, I wouldn't really because I am super white and don't do well in heat. Plus I'm not a stocker.

 Batman




Batman is definitely the richest of the heroes. So that's good. Although he plays the jerk pants he is actually the good dude and if you are good looking enough well then you will probably see that side of him. And don't be fooled by the creepy voice, he isn't a chain smoker, or maybe he is? I don't really know.

Ironman. 

 Kidding. Tony Stark is definitely the richest AND probably the wittiest AND probably the smartest AND probably as the most interesting facial hair. Plus I think his love story with Pepper is the cutest. The coolest thing about him is that he made himself a super human with his crazy heart contraption. (too be honest Batman isn't really super).


Anyways. Because there are no such things as super heroes, as far as we know, there are movies and google images.


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