Hot Dudes: Why your girlfriend hates you.

No matter what a girl says to you, what she wants is you to be a Nicholas Spark's character. This dude must have like a secret vagina because he knows exactly what a romantic woman wants (and unromantic women, because women are romantic and if they say otherwise they are liars or just have a hormonal imbalance.) What makes a Nicholas Sparks character?

#1 You must have a hot body

I never thought I'd be into butt cleavage, but it's official, I am. Bow chica wow wow! Am I right?

He looks so slippery, and so ab having...

New Movie alert! Safe Haven... also hot bod. Woo Woo!

#2 Always be doing this

(I've never actually seen this movie because I don't like watching old people doing it)

#Say absurdly romantic things while possibly being teary eyed

Although it's not possible to be kissed every second of every day, I would do it if zac efron was my man candy. Dear lord, I would.

He's so tall and nice looking. Also always use that line "You're not like other girls" perf.

Dear lord, This is why us ladies hate our boyfriends because they don't say things like this. RYAN GOSLING FOR REAL STOP RUING OUR LIVES!

So if you want your girlfriend to like you, either don't ever let her watch any of these movies, or perhaps take a note from Nicholas Sparks. I think I'm going to have a long night of Nicholas Sparks movie watching, seriously, this shit is good.

Hot Dudes: Hot Docs

You know those times when your uterus implodes because it knows it will never be impregnated by either Zac Efron or Ryan Goslings' babies and then you're rushed into the emergency room for false imploding uterus scenario and all you are thinking is "At least there will be Dr. McDreamy or Steamy to operate on me. Turns out all doctors are not hot. TELEVISION YOU RUIN OUR LIVES!
So here's list of hot docs that television tricks us into thinking maybe were based off a real life hotties. (the likelihood of this is a severe hell to the no, (has anyone ever seen a hot doctor? (for real?))).

George Clooney aka Dr. Doug Ross

 To be honest all I remember about about ER is when Dr. Green has brain cancer and he sticks out his tongue and it's crooked and his CANCER RETURNS and then he dies in Hawaii to the song "somewhere over the rainbow".
Anyways everyone thinks George Clooney is hot (all I see is a Ceasar haircut and droop eyes)(not even the eyebrows turn me on) Okay he's good looking but I don't want him to fill my uterus.

Jesse Spencer aka Dr. Robert Chase

Hello British accent! Hello smartie to the pants. He discovers strange illness like how those one people who were half siblings and didn't know it and were banging and making each other sick... that episode had Phil of the future guy Oh he's hot:

See hot (he's not a doctor but I'd forget if I didn't post about his hottness)

Martin Henderson aka Dr. Ben Keeton

Hello New Zealand accent! Hello Dimples! Hello Doctor in a crazy jungle. They don't even have to wear scrubs in the jungle just really tight shirts that hug all the right places aka pecs and abs. Yay! Sure he has a wife in a coma who is paying for the jungle hospital and is dating a dying mistress, but that's all for kicks and giggles he also gets down to serious doctor business, I think... I don't really remember the doctor stuff in that show. That's probably why it got canceled.

Chris Messina aka Dr. Danny Castelano

 I have like a weird HUGE ATTRACTION to this guy. Perhaps it's because on The Mindy Project he had some serious dance moves. And he's just adorable. He has weirdly attractive lips that are awesome.

Patrick Dempsy aka Derek Shepherd aka Dr. McDreamy

 So this isn't really a real doctor picture because he isn't scrubs but hey he looks good. He has this gaze... it's like he is staring into your soul and caring:

See what I mean, he cares. HE CARES! Plus he has that wavy curly god like hair. And stubble, good old stubble. And then he works on brains, which seem really hard and if I thought I had brain cancer then it'd be like POW! cured, operated.

Eric Dane aka Mark Sloane aka Dr. McSteamy

Shirtless? Yes, often in Grey's Anatomy he is shirtless. Like the perfect amount. Jk, the perfect amount would be all the time, am I right ladies? Am I right homosexual boys? Am I right boys who are man enough to say that they know that this guy is SEX ON A STICK! Plus if you wanted some new boobs, score! BOOM! Plastic Surgeon! Here's some more shirtless pictures of McSteamy:

Justin Chambers aka Alex Karev 

 He is such a dick hole, really he is. BUT THEN he gets ALL CUTE! Seriously. Sarah (my sister who doesn't cry) bawled like a girl on her period when Alex and Izzy got married. And then he was all singing to children and shit. We all secretly love the bad boys with no feelings the types that just takes the right woman to make him feel his feelings. Oh Alex.

Jesse Williams aka Dr. Jackson Avery

 Is it possible that he outshines both Mcdreamy and McSteamy? It's possible, you want to know why? He has the eyes of McDreamy:

And the Bod of McSteamy:

He may just outshine them... They just need to put that boy in a love story and I'll be set (perhaps he will, I'm not up to current Greys).

Anyways, I just wish I could find a hot doc so I wouldn't have to see them that much and they would take care of me and my hypochondriac of a sister, also doctors make a lot of money, and I like traveling. WOO!